Torturing People Part 9

Actually this one is more like "Killing people in a fun and innovative way" :D

Deadly sodium

Suggestd Material:
1. Sodium powder (you can choose other group II elements)
2. edible capsule


Steps:
1. Fill the capsule with sodium powder (or some other powder that you may have chosen).
2. Give it to your unfortunate victim. (or is he actually fortunate, since life is an endless series of misfortune... :D)
3. Make him swallow the pill. (be creative here, tell him that it's a stress relieve pill or something, depending on the victim's personality and interests).
4. Escape the crime scene immediately (just stay away from your victim). Watch the bloody fireworks (literally) from a distance. ;)

Note for non-chemistry people:
Sodium, and other group II elements are highly reactive chemicals. They are highly explosive when in contact with water.


Disclaimer:
No person or animal is harmed in the process of creating this post.
Any coincidence to anyone or any event is unintentional.
The author (i.e. me) would not be held responsible for any consequences if the torture/kill should be carried out.

Torturing People Part 8

Inspired by Kim Chee-making biology lab session...

Let's just call it
Kim Chee-Maker :p

Target: Anyone

Suggested Material:
1 gigantic ziploc bag
Chilli powder (optional)
Garlic (optional)
Gigantic hammer (if necessary)

Steps:
1. Lure, or force, or tie and throw, your victim into the gigantic ziploc bag.
2. Stuff your victim and make sure you can actually close the ziploc bag. (This is important!)
3. Put as much chilli powder and garlic as you like. Or you can choose to not put any at all! ;)
4. Close the ziploc bag, with your victim inside.
5. Start "massaging" the bag. (It's actually just squeezing and punching it.) Make sure you get the "juice" out, it is extremely important to have the "juice". Use those gigantic hammers if you have to.
6. Leave it there for one day.
7. Put it in the fridge if you prefer it cold.
8. It's ready to be tasted! ^^

This is a really good home-econs lesson isn't it? ^^


Disclaimer:
No person or animal is harmed in the process of creating this post.
Any coincidence to anyone or any event is unintentional.
The author (i.e. me) would not hold responsible for any consequences if the torture should be carried out.

Torturing people part 7

Inspired by Yi Song from SSEF

Bungey Jumping Thrill

Target: Anyone (especially those afraid of heights)

Suggested Material:
Ropes and more ropes
1 tall building or high cliff
1 gigantic boulder (optional)

Steps:
1. Lure, or force your target to the top of the building or cliff.
2. Tie one end of the rope to his/her waist, and the other anything stable that you can find where you are standing.
3. Repeat step 2 as many times and you like, with longer and longer rope. (Note: make sure the longest rope used is at most 3/4 the height of the building)
4. Push the person off the building/cliff. Listen carefully for the dupler effect. :p
5. Cut the ropes one by one, from the shortest to the longest. Appreciate the beauty of doppler effect.
6. You may or may not choose to cut the last rope, that's entirely up to you.
7. You may also choose to push the gigantic boulder off the building/cliff, whether or not you cut the last rope.

Lesson learnt: Doppler effect ^^


Disclaimer:
No person or animal is harmed in the process of creating this post.
Any coincidence to anyone or any event is unintentional.
The author (i.e. me) would not hold responsible for any consequences if the torture should be carried out.

Torturing people part 6

There is no explanation for my saddistic behavior...

Gingantic Bloody Mary maker

Target: Anyone

Material: (suggested)
3 large sharp blades
1 giant cylindrical plastic container
1 cap for the container
1 base

Steps:
1. Build a gigantic juice blender with the material suggested.
2. Put your target into the juice blender. You can choose to lure him/her into the blender, or simply tie him/her and throw him/her into it.
3. Switch on the blender.
4. Watch the blending while listening to the screams by your victims.
5. After 8-10 minutes (approximately), switch of the blender.
6. Pour out the contents, and enjoy your Bloody Mary. ^^


Disclaimer:
No person or animal is harmed in the process of creating this post.
Any coincidence to anyone or any event is unintentional.
The author (i.e. me) would not hold responsible for any consequences if the torture should be carried out.

Conflicts Within

Being a thinking being is really an honor, but it's also a pain. A being with thought, we think about good an evil, we generate love and hatred, likes and dislikes...

I, being a mortal, seem to be constantly stuck between like and dislike. I usually bear grudges. I can seldom control my emotions. I am not forgiving at all. Because of this, I have people that I do not like. It may be because of their character, the way they treat me, etc.

Yet sometimes, they just seem so nice! It makes me feel very guilty, for bad-mouthing about them. It makes me feel evil, guilty, terrible. I really should start looking at the angelic side of people, see the good in people, feel the kindness in people.

The ability to think is a gift, that turns rotten at the hands of evil. With good discipline, we should be able to use this gift to bring about peace and good to humanity.

Torturing people -- Special Edition 2

Another special editon! Whee!! Inspired by Belinda waiting for her parents.

Target: Kids (who are waiting for their parents to fetch them)

Steps:
1. Go to the kid, with a really nice big smile.
2. Talk to him and ask him about his parents.
3. Then loooking grave, say "Why aren't your parents here yet? Maybe they don't want you anymore..."
4. Leave the kid alone to think...

The kid would probably think, walk away, think further, then cry... Quite evil!
Advice to parents: Don't make your kid wait!!
Note: This torture is NOT advised to be carried out.

Disclaimer:
No kid or animal is being harmed in the process of creating this post.
Any coincidence to anyone or any event is unintentional.
The author (i.e. me) would not hold responsible for any consequences if the torture should be carried out.

Torturing people -- Special Edition

This is called a "special edition" because it's actually for kids only. But I really don't want to start a new series. So there...

Target: Kids!!

Steps:
1. Stick stickers onto a fruit that can be consumed with the skin.
2. Tell the kid this, "It would be better if you collect the stickers in your stomach, then nobody cna steal it!"
3. Make the kid eat the fruit with stickers... Hehehezzz

Note: targeted kids will probably have to be interested in collecting stickers.
This torture is not advised to be carried out!

Disclaimer: (I really see the need to put this up this time)
No kid or animal is harmed in the process of creating this post.
Any coincidence to anyone or any event is unintentional.
The author (i.e. me) would not hold responsible for any consequences if the torture should be carried out.

Torturing people part 5

Back by popular demand!! (I think...)
There's a physics exam tomorrow, does that explain my sadistic behavior? :p

This torture is target-specific. It can only be applied to a certain group of people.

Target: Fashion disasters who thinks they are "stylish"
For those who know who I'm talking about, good for you. For those who don't... Too bad! :p

Steps:
1. Film your victim everyday in horrendous "costumes". Avoid his/her face as much as possible, except for the last shot.
2. A week later... Invite him/her to a screening. Tie him/her to the chair in case he/her faints or runs away.
3. Run the video. At the same time, try making him/her agree that the "style" is horrifying.
4. Toward the end... "Wait, that person looks familiar... Hey, isn't it YOU?!"

*Note: It may not work since the person may be immune to bad taste. I mean he/she is one!


Disclaimer: (just in case...) ;)
Any coincidence to anyone or any event is unintended.

Physics

I don't hate physics. In fact, I like physics. It can be quite fun, when you know how to solve the problem, that is.

Anyway...
Saw Mr. Lim outside the staff room yesterday. Then he pointed to me and said, "You're dropping Physics right?"

"Yes." I was really serious, a little sad too.

Then he started smiling merrily!! SO MEAN! I'm soooo hurt. Cryz... He wouldn't even stop smiling when I said, "Why are you smiling so merrily (or something like that)? So mean!" I mean, is it really that painful to be marking my assignments and teaching me the concepts and all? Cryz...

Very hurt. But it's quite amusing. Haha...

Endangered Species

"The ultimate cycad is critically endangered." Yingzhen

Critically endangered: less than 50 mature individuals
=> there is only 1 ultimate cycad

Reason for extinction (sooner or later it will happen):
Stress
Poking (人poke人，poke死人)
Homework
Assignments
Projects
Tests
Quizes
EXAMS!!

The Barbaric Civilization

Turned on the television today at around 5.15pm. Don't really know what to watch. When I turned to Mediacorp Channel 5, they were broadcasting the Guinness World Record Primetime II.

I was rather interested. The first record was on the uglist dog. I find the dog rather pretty though. Very much like the dog Cruela in 101 Dalmatians owns. A lot of people just find it ugly and freaky...

The second record:
The transparent inflated ball 10 feet in diameter, with a chamber in the middle for one person.
It looks extremely intersting, I would love to try it, although it looks dangerous. But life is all about that isn't it. ;)

The third record: what triggers me
A guy who can disjoint his joints, making him extremely flexible.
He was brought out in a white box, about the size of a small luggage. When it was unlocked... The way he crawled out of his tiny holding place was really scary, it's like a ghost creeping out from its hiding place in those horror movies (not that I watch them often). He was then suppose to get himself into a locked strait jacket. When he was doing so, he twisted his body, made crackling sounds by disjoining his joints, and pounded on the floor.

It's the expression on the audience's faces I cannot forget. Awe, horror, amazement, excitement, fear... All etched on the same faces. It reminds me of the scene in From Hell, where the Elephant man is revealed to the supposed upper class. They were fearful, yet they were curious. The sight of what is shown to them was far too ugly for the eyes, yet they yearn for more. They were horrified by the form, yet they were amazed by the accidents in nature.

It's the same emotion rollercoaster the audience in the Guinnes World Records were going through when they watched the man pound on the floor.

Today we claim to be civilized. We banned the barbaric gladiator showdown. We tear down gladiator arenas. Yet we built air-conditioned rings for similar purposes. The shows may not be as bloody, yet it satisfies our barbaric nature just as much.

Mooncake Festival

It's not often that the mid-autumn festival is around my birthday. So this year's is really cool.

Anyway Mr Lee gave each of us a yellow bouncy ball, with a smiley face drawn on it. I think the bouncy ball is really cute, and the intention is totally sweet. I mean teachers don't usually give presents on mooncake festival. Although the yellow bouncy ball may look like a moon or durain-flavored mooncake or whatever, I don't think it has anything to do with the mooncake festival at all. I guess he's just trying to cheer us up. Which is why it's soooo sweet! Our mentor rocks!!

Thank you

This feeling has been bubbling inside me for quite some time. I have this urge to thank so many people, but having little courage to do so. ;) This post shall be dedicated to the teachers.

To teachers:
Mr Lee -- For having so much patience to explain the concepts over and over again, and listening to all the complains I always seem to have. :p

Dr. Ng -- For always being so gentle (although still quite intimidating) and patiently guiding me through my work.

Mr. Lim -- For giving up the time to tutor us individual, even if it means that he has to crunch on chocolate bars.

Dr. Seah -- For making me talk about my problems. It really feels a lot better after that.

Lee Lao Shi -- For patiently explaining what every single zi ci in zhong he tian kong means.

And the rest of the teachers and staff for your care and smile.

I think our school rocks, because of the teachers and staff we have!! Whee!!

Pressure, Tears. Hatred, Love.

Good morning to the world!
With only 24 hours to spend
Minus the 6 hours I have wasted on sleeping
I have 18 hours left.

I go to the washroom
Who needs a tap
When there is more water
flowing out of my eyes.

I look into the mirror.
Why do I look 50, when I am barely 18.
Someone must have been sucking my life,
I am open to better explainations.

Wearing my uniform,
the school's identity,
in place of my own.
But who needs identity,
when you're not at home?

I swear I could become a weight-lifter.
I practice everyday
with my school bag as the weight.

In class, all I see is formulas
whether my eyes are opened or closed.
20 formulas to memorize this week,
there will be a quiz on the next.

I could barely find my table
in the midst of assignments and worksheets.
If these were diamonds and gold,
I'd rather have trunks of coal.

God of Dreams is on my side.
To help me study better
he allows lectures to continue in my dream
saving me the time to revise for my quiz.

Undermining my confidence.
Slicing off my health.
Giving my youth.
All for the sake of the future.
A future I can barely see.
A future that is beyond reach.
A future that has more for me?

October Baby

(a forward mail)

Loves to chat. Loves those who love them. Loves to takes things at the center. Inner and physical beauty. Lies but doesn't pretend. Gets angry often. Treats friends importantly. Brave and fearless. Always making friends. Easily hurt but recovers easily. Daydreamer. Opinionated. Does not care to control emotions. Unpredictable. Extremely smart, but definitely the hottest AND sexiest of them all.

Weirdo Yingzhen

From Yingzhen's blog, post "So Happy!"...

Hi Kar Yen!
Haha Kar Yen made my day today!
Yay Karyen rocks you!
Hahah am so proud of her!
This is so funny cos I am typing this in front of her and this is like, flattery but never mind. Hahah she finds this very amusing. But then again, she finds everything amusing.
Byebye Karyen! (She just left.)...

She's the one who finds everything amusing, not me.
I am utterly disappointed in her for only learning to appreciate me after such a loooong time... *cryz*
Hahaha... This is amusing! Weirdo Yingzhen! You rock!!

Cycad

What?
Cycad is an ancient plant that existed ever since dinosaurs walk the earth.

How?
During Bio-diversity lesson in year 2006 semester 1, Yingzhen suddenly points at me and started calling me "Cycad". Reason unknown.

Future?
I mentioned in my last post how a name may affect someone's behavior, what would happen if I'm addressed as "Cycad" all the time? Perhaps...

I'll grow spikey
not bad, at least I'll stand a lower chance of being struck by the lightening

I'll be really quiet
have never seen a talking plant before (except in cartoons, but they don't count)

My cells may evolve and have chloroplasts and cell wall and vacoule
Okay, this is ridiculus :P

Names

(Posted this on Where I Belong blog as well)

"What's in a name that which we call a rose by any other word would smell as sweet"
Romeo and Juliet by William Shakespeare

Well, the issue on names suddenly pop up on my head. It's not exactly random, it deals with issues of identity...

Anyway, I thought of responding to a different name every day/week/month. I wonder how that would be. I guess sometimes we are so attached to our name that we don't hear anything but our names. I shall try it next week. Hehez...

Back to the Romeo and Juliet statement... I read an article some time last year or the year before that names actually do make a difference. A rose would not smell as sweet if we know it as "feces" or something. That's the general idea.

If we observe the peopel around us, some people with the same names actually turn out to be pretty similar. That leaves us to think...

Lesson:
Never give your child a bad name. ;)

Last day of my life...

IF today is the last day+night of my life...
(the following is the list of things I would do)

Ditch school
going to school is so that we get results and be able to survive in the society (or so they say)

Dress myself in a wedding gown
I always think wedding gowns are pretty

Burn homework and assignments and projects
I wanted to do that long ago... *evil grin*

Repay all my debts
don't want to die owing people stuff

Shop-til-drop
I don't think $$ would be needed in the other world right (if there is one), might as well make myself happy! ^-^

Punch up people I really dislike
it's not like they can punch me back if they can't find me in the next 24hrs ;P

Star-gaze
have never done it before, and I think it's really romantic (even if you're alone)

Watch the sun-set & sun-rise
have never seen the real thing (another romantic one)

Experience free-fall
always wonder how it feels like. It would be great if I know the exact time of death, so that I can time myself such that I wouldn't be alive when I touch the ground ;P


More to come... (I'll think of more)


This is the time your really wish there's more than mere 24 hours a day. ^-^

Emails

Received another email from a relative I know not of from some distant land for financial assitance, promising me profit and reward. This is the 7th spam mail I receieved this month.

How did I know it's a spam mail?
1. It would be more sensible to contact my parents if any of such distant relative of mine is in trouble, since they would be a distant relative to my parents as well. I mean what's the point of informing a financially dependent teenager of a financial crisis?
2. It's obvious they were hacking my account information since they got the surname wrong. (They have one of my first name as the supposed surname.)

Seriously, don't people have better things to do? Something beneficial to the community, perhaps?